You are not alone if you get scared of the idea of approaching women because you fear rejection. The fear of rejection is one of the most common social fears that people of all walks of life have. Even a lot of the people that you would think do not have this kind of fear, do. Dealing with it is not always easy. And if it keeps you from actually doing what you want to do, as in, approaching a woman, it can have pretty severe consequences on your life.
After all, what joy can you get out of life if you are held back by the fear of rejection?
Some people will never get over this. They will allow this fear to keep them in virtual chains. They will only socialize with the same people that they feel comfortable with. Some will go as far as staying inside of their house most of the time. Now, it may not really be that bad for you. Still, if it keeps you from walking on over to a woman you find attractive, you have to admit that it does have a negative impact on you and your life.
How do you over come this so that you CAN start approaching women?
Tip 1 - Admit to yourself that this is an issue that you DO want to work on.
Just being able to admit that you have a problem with approaching women is something that you need to be able to do, and most guys will not. They don't want to feel vulnerable or they just don't want to admit it in front of their peers or something. Well, you don't have to openly tell someone else, but you do have to be honest with yourself and admit that you do have a fear of rejection and that it does keep you from advancing on a woman that you would like to be able to talk to and get to know.
Tip 2 - Visualize yourself actually going through the motions of approaching a woman, and imagine yourself being confident and not caring if she rejects you.
The key to using this kind of visualization technique is to make it as REAL as possible. If you do make it as real as you possibly can and you normally get nervous or feel the fear coming over you, then you should be able to feel it when you are just visualizing yourself approaching a woman. If you are not, then you are not making it REAL enough. If you can, visualize everything else that would be there in that situation. Picture the bar, the crowd of people, the noise of the music, etc.
Tip 3 - Take that same visualization, and now drown out all of the other things, so that all you see is the woman you want to approach and feel a sense of calmness coming over you.
Once you are able to get to the point where it feels REAL and you can see everything around you, you want to take away all of the other stuff like the bar, the crowd, the sound of the music. This helps to get you in that zone where you don't feel the nerves so much. And once you feel that calmness come over you and you visualize yourself approaching her, feel what it's like to talk to her now. If it feels more comfortable and like you don't care if she rejects you or not, you're done.
Now, this visualization technique will not make all of the fear instantly go away. You will still feel some it, What it DOES do, is give you a point of reference in your mind where you can see yourself feeling the way that you normally do, changing that feeling, and actually succeeding in making the approach.
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